12-16-98
I went to pay my respects today. I had always had a bad attitude about wakes and viewings and
funerals. Maybe a lot had to do with the COBU "leave the dead ..."
July of 1997 my brother died. Many came to the service and I marveled at all the nice things
people had to say. My brother supervised 13 co-workers who said he was a joy to work for. I
remember him telling me how he hated how he had been treated in the past at other companies.
He learned from that, and did better for others. I was one of the pallbearers. I saw the coffin
closed. I took the coffin to the limo and then to the grave. This should provide closure. But for
months afterward I still would think, "I haven't seen my brother for a while, he should be coming
through that door any time now". It was hard to deal with the fact that he just won't be there
anymore. By the way, my brother was led in the sinners prayer by Rem down at Pine Street. A
friend of mine had his brother die last Christmas. I had known his brother pretty well in the past
myself. I went to the viewing. I now know the importance of a little support. And today I went
to pay my respects to Skip O'Neill.
I am glad Chris wrote a few things about Skip. He handed out a very heartfelt message at the
viewing. I always knew Skip was something special, but I had no idea.
I had to leave when the service started at 2 so I wouldn't be late for work. What followed, I hear
was what would be expected of the caliber of brethren who were Skip's peers. Superb. Skip was
very instrumental in their faith and their relationship with Jesus. After everyone spoke, the
minister presiding over the service commented "I had no idea" and I think had nothing more to add.
The talks amounted to a moving and inspirational experience. I should have told my work that I
would be late.
What these brothers said throws a whole new perspective out for me. I knew the older brothers
really were special, and not the bad guys. But much more than that: they were the foundation and
pillars in a good work. And another thought: on the way home my friend said: "Stewart is really
stupid; he could have had a really good thing". Because these brothers were real and dedicated.
And because of that, these real brothers - the Church grew. People were drawn in by the
personableness of Skip and others. Stewart was an oddball. But the humane side of the
fellowship was instrumental to the growth of the FF. Jesus was working magnificently. And Skip
had an extremely big role in this. If not the ultimate role. We owe a lot to him. Had he been
allowed to function in the way that God called him and had blessed him - who knows?
Unfortunately, it turned out different. When I think about what Skip endured, the treatment he
suffered... He was some brother.
There will be a funeral coming some day, and those who care to show up at the viewing will be
motivated by one thing: you will see a lot of people walking by the coffin with a pin to poke and
check to make sure he is dead. Make that "two pins". (Those of us around COBU in the 1970's
will remember this phrase and its constant use "would two pins maybe get him to move?" And
sometimes just the words "two pins" were said in exasperation at someone's apparent
complacency or just plain lack of physical movement.)
Rest in peace Skip. Thank you for what you gave us. Skip had a part in our coming to know one
another. And aren't we a good bunch of saints?! We are privileged to have had the opportunity to
be a little part of it. And to get to know a lot of good brothers and sisters.
Rest in peace, Skip.